Brian Edwards Media

Miracle on Albert Street – HERALD TURNS INTO THE SUN!!!

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A week or so back in ABSENCE OF SHOCK LEAVES READERS SHOCKED I suggested that our daily metropolitan newspapers were broadsheet in format but tabloid in content. I’m indebted to The Herald for so promptly providing me with incontrovertible evidence to back up my claim. Today’s front page titillates readers with:

WIN a $60,000 Subaru Legacy

CAN PAMELA REALLY SPICE UP FASHION WEEK? 

The dead billionaire, her ‘boy toy’ and the $US4 billion will

Revealed: biggest killers on our roads

And sport of course.

The only thing missing is the Page 3 girl. Though, come to think of it, Pammie is on Page 3.

Hence my new and improved headline: Miracle on Albert Street: HERALD TURNS INTO THE SUN

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14 Comments:

  1. Surely the best bit, though, is the thunderingly out-of-place tagline “The news week starts here…”
    A truly astonishing lack of self-awareness.

    • Surely the best bit, though, is the thunderingly out-of-place tagline “The news week starts here…”
      A truly astonishing lack of self-awareness.

      My very thought!

  2. You will also recall that you said of the Herald, “It may nonetheless be our best newspaper” to which I observed that you were being too generous. Possibly the Herald reflects the intellect of its collective readership in Auckland, your good self excepted of course. But of course all newspapers as does commercial television and radio, reflect the audience; usually the lowest common denominator.

    The Herald is and always has been a broadsheet rag and I still maintain that both The Press and DomPost are far superior. It could be something to do with neither of these papers being part of the Murdoch stable.

    • You will also recall that you said of the Herald, “It may nonetheless be our best newspaper” to which I observed that you were being too generous.

      I lived in Chrischurch for five years when I first came to Godzone and considered The Press a very good paper. So you may be right. I’m a regular visitor to Wellington and my conclusion about the DomPost is that there’s almost nothing in it. By that criterion, the Herald would certainly be superior. As we used to say: Never mind the quality, feel the width.

  3. How dare you insult a fine newspaper by comparing it with… The Herald

  4. That’s what happens when you cut the staff to a bare minimum and leave just a skeleton crew working over the weekend – the Monday front page is 60 percent advertising. But this soaking up of white space with style rather than content applies throughout the week. Huge photos with huge headlines and side bars over flowing with tautology dominate and the facts per column inch ratio has plummeted in the past few years.

    As a reluctant subscriber, I’ve managed to extract a value-added component to my reading of the Herald with a new game. On Saturdays, after a go at the crossword on the back of the front section, I count the number of times Michele Hewitson uses the first person pronoun in relation to herself. The total usually exceeds the number of paragraphs. I’ve only been at it for a wee while and, I have to say, the total’s been dropping lately. The record in recent times was the interview with Peter Fitzsimons/a>. In 43 paragraphs, Hewtison referred to herself 48 times. Hewitson did much better last week with 20 references to herself in 39 paragraphs. Usually, the score is about the same as the 35 references to herself in the 36 paragraphs ostensible about Bob Harvey.

    I wonder what the score would be if any of the paragraphs were more than one sentence long.

    • That’s what happens when you cut the staff to a bare minimum and leave just a skeleton crew working over the weekend – the Monday front page is 60 percent advertising.

      Hmm. Interesting. I’m intrigued by the number of people who’ve worked for the Herald who have a less than flattering opinion of the paper. A pity. I’ve praised the Herald in the past for its superb campaigns and its World section is excellent. But…

  5. Ah Brian the D P is redeemed a trite…does carry Doonesbury :-)

  6. You – unkind – Herald critics seem to lose sight of the fact that we’re a farming nation; the exporting of primary products being the mainstay of our economy. Hence, the paper is only catering to the ‘agrestic’ tastes of the people — that is, fairly basic. And can you blame them, when our idea of cultural refinement is being delighted by a performance of a vociferous haka. So much so, that every man and his dog is quick to do it at the drop of a hat. The personification of Truculent Ugliness.

    Having an Arts and Culture section in the Herald, would be wasted on 95.78% of its readers. Seriously, there’s no point in serving up cordon bleu cuisine to someone whose level of culinary appreciation — and awareness — runs no deeper than a McDonald’s with French fries.

  7. Hello Brian. Last year I was fortunate enough to visit the campus of University of California Berkeley. Upon entering one of the many cafes, I noticed a row of cabinets given entirely to displaying the front pages of about 10 newspapers from around the world. Included was the New Zealand Herald. I have to say that at the time I was just a little proud. However, to have a front page like the one you’ve highlighted prominently displayed in such a wonderful place as UC Berkeley is just plain wrong. And this newspaper is supposedly New Zealand’s leading broadsheet? Not now.

  8. Hang on Merv.

    Doesn’t the ‘New Zealand herald’ primarially serve the population of the Auckland Cities?

    If you want to maintain the ‘Granny-herald-is-designed-for-oafish-peasants’ argument, go ahead, just take out the link to farming.

  9. The Herald must’ve taken heed of your barb, Brian. The following day’s front-page layout was quite a bit different. Less tabloid-esque; more The Australian-esque.

    While I can see how the front-page format can jar your sensibilities, the actual “innards” is nothing like what the eye-catching front page would suggest.

    • The Herald must’ve taken heed of your barb, Brian. The following day’s front-page layout was quite a bit different. Less tabloid-esque; more The Australian-esque.

      I doubt that the Herald will have ‘taken heed of my barb’, Mickey. But it’s a nice thought.