Brian Edwards Media

John Key denies having made Beckham ‘batshit’ comment


[Courtesy of Greg Goodyer}

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  1. Mr Key’s flat denial at Question Time yesterday, that he not used the word “batshit,” raises more questions than answers. Why did he wait 3 days to deny? What words did he use?
    The very few slip ups from Helen in 9 long years, became oft repeated memes.
    Trouble with John is that since he makes so many it is hard to pick which ones to focus on.
    Brilliant work Greg especially the last seconds.

  2. Very funny

  3. Man, what a hoot! The very last second, see how the eyes shift to the left. Don’t need Greg to parody our PM. Because the way things are, Key is becoming a caricature of himself.

  4. I honestly can’t believe people are still trying to make mileage out of a silly brainfart when National are doing so much genuinely horrific stuff to the country. It comes across as a bit shrill, and come on – Beckham isn’t the brightest crayon in the box.

    BE: He’s the Prime Minister. He’s talking to schoolkids. He should have been more careful. And his 3-days-late denial looks rather weak. The media reaction comes as part of the territory.

    As for Beckham not being ‘the brightest crayon in the box’, you have to ask by which criterion of brightness. Intelligence comes in many forms. We have a wonderful builder called Paul. He built our house in Waiheke. He’d never make it into Mensa. He doesn’t have that sort of intelligence. He’s a craftsman and a problem solver. His intelligence is in his hands and has been nurtured by years of experience. The same is true of many tradesmen. There are many forms of intelligence. I’m pretty good with words and have dialectical skill. But I’m a klutz at anything practical, from DIY to sport. Which is why I’m amazed by such skills in other people. I can’t believe that the panel-beater can make my car look brand new again after a prang. And how on earth does the plasterer get that wall so smooth. Intelligence, experience, a good eye and smart hands. Beckham’s intelligence involves lightning-fast reflexes and split-second decision-making, aligned with extraordinary physical skill. He’s a genius on the soccer field. How smug, self-satisfied and contemptuous of others do you have to be to describe someone like that as ‘not the brightest crayon in the box’?

  5. The actual media footage was even funnier than Greg’s excellent parody.Your point about intelligence reflects the indoctrination we get as children with regard to our skills and IQ.I ve always considered that peices of paper (money and qualifications )dont always reflect an individuals true worth.John Key appears to be a case in point.

  6. In a related topic (to the word’s Mr Key is said to have used), a certain tobacco company recently tweeted this message:

    “plain packs may increase health threats posed by counterfeit tobacco, while costing taxpayers millions”

    Now THAT’s “thick as BAT shit”.

  7. BE: “Beckham’s intelligence involves lightning-fast reflexes and split-second decision-making, aligned with extraordinary physical skill. He’s a genius on the soccer field”.

    And so say all of us. But he’s also quite articulate — as this excerpt reveals from an interview he had with Sports Illustrated (July 2003), when asked to explain his remarkable ability to curve the ball when taking free-kicks outside the penalty box, and lasering the corners of the goal frame.

    David Beckham: “Rather than being seen as just one of those rare mutant virtuosos of raw force, you’ll find that taking a shot at goal outside the penalty box, like money pool, requires geometric thinking, the ability to calculate not merely your own angles but the angles of response to your angles. Because the expansion of response-possibilities is quadratic, I am required to think n shots ahead, where n is a hyperbolic function limited by the *sinh of the goal keeper’s reflexes and the *cosh of the shot in the kick. What I have he ability to do, is I could also admit the differential complication of wind into my calculations, I could think and kick octacally. For the wind put curves in the lines of flight of the ball transforming the distance between me and the goal post into 3-space.

    *In mathematics, hyperbolic functions are analogs of the ordinary trigonometric, or circular, functions. The basic hyperbolic functions are the hyperbolic sine “sinh” and the hyperbolic cosine “cosh”.

    For those of youse who didn’t get past School Cert. maths, I added that footnote to explain ‘sinh’ and ‘cosh’.

    Clearly, Becks progressed beyond 6th-form maths. And I’d say English, too. So, I’m flummoxed — as with any goalkeeper defending against a Becks free-kick at goal — as to why John Key thinks Beckham is “thick as batshit”.

  8. Key may have been just ruminating in his usual style, out loud, about himself. Its all someones else’s fault, of course, for overhearing.

  9. The best commentary I heard was someone tweeting that Key was becoming the “Borat of the South Pacific”…

    Some ask why this is important…

    It probably isn’t. Now when unemployment has reached 7.3% and National’s response is to legislate punitive measures against those who dare to be unemployed. Or dare to be solo-mums (but never solo-dads) because their partners were drunkens, gamblers, violent, violent drunks, or preferred that pretty young thing working in the office…

    Compare to all that, it’s probably not terribly important in the scheme of things – if it had been a lone incident.

    But it’s not a lone incident and Key’s propensity to bend the truth and tell outright lies has become his new signature. Only the most ardent National faithful or Party apparatchik, believes anything that Dear Leader utters, without question.

    It matters because if our Dear Leader cannot be trusted, it further alienates people from the political process.

    It matters because 1,058,656 voters cast their ballot for National (I wonder how many are refetting that, now?) – and not for the McGillicudy Serious Party.

    It matters because it appears more and more that Key no longer wants the job, and just wants it over and done with. (see:

    A politician in power, who no longer cares, is a dangerous creature. It means that regardless of social and economic problems, he is no longer motivated to address those problems.

    Considering his off-the-cuff dismissal of the skyrocketing rise in unemployment (7.3%), I’d say that illustrates why his attitude is something we should take note of.

  10. Damn typos.

    “Now when unemployment has reached 7.3%” = Not when unemployment has reached 7.3%

    “refetting” = regretting

  11. Key now says “he won’t be changed”. That just leaves his position as PM to be changed. Can the voters put up with him all the way to November 2014?

  12. Indeed, Kat.

    With his latest behaviour, one has to question his fitness to be PM.

    Even two of our aquaintances (both National Party voters) have changed their views on Key in the last two weeks.

    It is time for him to go.

  13. Wow! Someone is actually talking about this. I’ve searched the mainstream media & can find nothing.

    So who is lying? John Key during question time in Parliament or the reporter who made this story up? Does anyone have a transcript, has anyone interviewed the kids Key was said to have said this to? Does nobody care that there is a strong possibility that our Prime Minister is a barefaced liar, or have we all just got used to the idea that our leaders (or the media) will say whatever they need to say to get themselves out of whatever mess it is they have got themselves into?

  14. For what it’s worth, I would love to see John Key out there in the white hot intensity of an important EPL match….