Another 'Brian's Bountiful Bonds' winner!

Perhaps the most important precept in consumer affairs is ‘caveat emptor’ – let the buyer beware. I would have thought this applied as much to investing one’s life savings in a finance company offering above average returns as to buying a flat screen TV or washing machine from a discount store. More really, since in the first case we’re talking about hundreds of thousands of dollars while, in the second, maybe a few hundred bucks will be at stake and the product will be covered by the Consumer Guarantees Act anyway.

In the first instance, therefore, a sensible investor might be wise to get some advice from someone in the finance advisory sector, though preferably not from an advisor employed by the same bank that has a controlling stake in the finance company flogging the product. That advisor just might not be entirely objective… or honest.

On the other hand, an investor  might take the advice of Richard Long, a former television newsreader, on what to do with their retirement funds, or former sports broadcaster, Keith Quinn, on preparing for his or her own eventual demise, or former cricket captain, Stephen Fleming, on how to best warm or cool their home, or (if they prefer fencing paddocks to news-reading) former All Black, Colin Meads, on what to do with their retirement funds, or funny man Mike King on where to buy… well…  just about anything.

In every case that would be a pretty stupid thing to do, since Richard has no expertise in investing for retirement, Keith, despite appearances, is not  dead, Stephen probably couldn’t wire a fuse, Colin,  well, just  listen to the man, and Mike King tells jokes for a living, which really ought to be a warning in itself.   Read the rest of this entry »

Many years ago, when I was running the television modules at the AUT,  I invited Tom Parkinson, former Head of Entertainment with TVNZ and one of the driving forces behind TV3, to give a guest lecture to some of my senior students. I assumed he would talk about Light Entertainment, but his theme was the remarkable similarity in structure between network television news and the  old time  music hall.  It was mostly about placement: where in the programme you put the starring acts (major stories), second tier acts (less major stories), intermissions (commercial breaks), comedy acts (funny stories), high wire acts (dramatic stories), pre-intermission acts (teasers),  heart-warming acts (human interest stories) and so on.  ‘Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em cry, make ‘em wait.’ It was a fascinating lecture and the exactness of the analogy was remarkable.

I don’t think it was Tom’s intention to suggest that the actual content of the television news bulletin should be the same as the content of a music hall bill, but I’m starting to feel that that is where we are inexorably going. Our news-reading duos increasingly look like comedy double acts. Read the rest of this entry »

Kev Writes

Photo: TVNZ

Feel free to stick my photo up on your site any time, Brian. Fair Go doesn’t ask permission to stick other people’s photos up on the wall and nor should you.

I think companies that deal with the public have a responsibility to front up to the public when things go wrong. That includes fronting up on television. It’s not good enough to just say, “we’ll fix it…but we refuse to talk on the telly about what happened, who was responsible, or if it’s likely to happen again.”

The Fair Go Wall is about companies not fronting up on camera when we think there are still questions to be answered. It’s not about whether they’ve decided to fix the problem or not.

Now there’s the Wall, these people know they’ll be “appearing” if they front up or not.

As for Mr Callander. He had every opportunity to front up to the camera originally but didn’t. Good on him for fronting up in the end, though.

I Reply with a Challenge

Good morning, old friend. And thanks for replying to my post. Unfortunately, that isn’t good enough. As a public figure, I don’t think just providing a written response to my complaint will do. I require you to come to my premises, so that I can cross-examine you further on this infringement. If you fail to do so, I will put a large photograph of you in the window of my offices with the inscription: Kev Milne – Wanted for Questioning! I will refuse to take it down until you yield, Further, when you get here, I will take measures to loosen your tongue, by forcing you to drink large quantities of fine wine. So there!

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In the early 70s, not long after I left the ground-breaking current affairs television programme Gallery, I was approached by an advertising agency who wanted me to front a multi-media campaign for a publication called New Zealand Heritage. I was on the bones of my bum at the time and the appeal of making what I imagined would be a quick killing was considerable.

New Zealand Heritage was an educational part-work, a sort of New Zealand encyclopaedia in instalments. The editorial board behind the publication was a Who’s Who of eminent New Zealand scholars. It was an entirely respectable enterprise. Read the rest of this entry »