Brian Edwards Media

Posts Tagged 'Sport'

I risk deportation by using the S-word to describe Sonny Bill Williams


I read that the punters were dissatisfied with the Sonny Bill Williams/Clarence Tillman III fight for the New Zealand Heavyweight Boxing Championship. There were apparently two reasons for their dissatisfaction: that neither boxer merited being in contention for the Championship at all; and that the fight was over in 2 minutes 54 seconds. I can’t judge the validity of their first complaint. But I do understand their annoyance at the brevity of the bout. After all, if you’ve paid up to $100 to be ringside or almost $40 to watch the match on Sky, you’re surely entitled to see two men beating the crap out of one another for at least 20 minutes.

As for Sonny Bill, even I can see that he’s a brilliant footie player, but ‘brilliant’ is not a term you can apply to anyone interested in a career in professional boxing.  Read the rest of this entry »


It’s a goal!


While this website is generally a sports-free-zone, I can’t resist sharing this – possibly the greatest fluke in soccer!



Mens sana in corpore sano: Why I don’t much like Trev’s recipe for Kiwi kids.

As a kid I hated sport, both looking at it and playing it. Looking at it I could just about tolerate, but as an activity,  sport – any sport – was for me a torture.

Kids who hate playing sport generally aren’t very good at sport. And it’s probably a truism that people don’t get enjoyment from taking part in activities they aren’t good at. I could not kick a ball, throw a ball, hit a ball, catch a ball. I could neither run nor jump. I was hopeless. Being hopeless isn’t fun.

I also had no interest in doing any of these things. I was physically non-competitive, the rational outcome of always losing and of being a fearful child, frightened of being hurt by an oncoming cricket ball or an oncoming front row forward.

I was particularly frightened of rugby. Crashing into other boys on a muddy paddock for an hour was my idea of hell and I refused to do it. But rugby was compulsory at our school and my mother’s pleading that Brian was a delicate little boy fell on deaf ears. The only permitted alternative to rugby was to join the Combined Cadet Force.

I joined. But the uniform felt rough, and the boots hurt, and the .303 was heavy and dug into my shoulder and I would not take orders from anybody. I was eventually allowed to turn up at rugby but not actually play. “You can sit on the sideline and study, Edwards, till the game is over.” Nirvana had arrived. Read the rest of this entry »


The Ignoble Sport of Boxing


Photo: One News

Photo: One News

‘I’m willing to die for what’s about to take place.’  So said David Tua about his heavyweight boxing fight tonight with Nigerian Friday Ahunanya.

I wondered what it was that Tua was ‘willing to die for’ – money, fame, glory? Or the many further opportunities to be ‘willing to die’ which the pathway to the heavyweight championship of the world and, if he reaches that goal, the ongoing defence of that title, will offer him.

There can be nobility in being willing to die for a cause – the protection of one’s family, friends, country, of liberty or democracy. But there seems to be little nobility, or indeed sense, in deliberately putting oneself in harm’s way, in being ‘willing to die’ for money, fame, glory or the victor’s belt.  Read the rest of this entry »


Confessions of a Rugby Hater



The success of the All Whites in making it to next year’s soccer world cup finals reminded me of my love for ‘the beautiful game’ and my absolute failure to understand the appeal of rugby. 

This is probably an indication that you can live in a country for almost half a century, become a citizen of that country, regard it as home, brook no criticism of it from strangers and yet never fully understand or share the mindset of those who were born and bred there. If I were a Kiwi, I might feel quite differently about the national game.

Then again, I might not. My dislike for rugby can not  be fully explained by my being a stranger in a strange land. I’m quite capable of nationalistic pride when it comes to cricket or netball. And, like most born-again Kiwis, there’s nothing that pleases me more than when the Black Caps or the Silver Ferns humble the Aussies.

No, my distaste for the oval ball has  more to do with the game itself. It is terminally boring to watch. Read the rest of this entry »


Bag a Duckshooter Today!

Ducks at dawnDuck shooting season begins today. I can understand the necessary killing of animals for food, but I’m damned if I can understand anyone taking pleasure in shooting a beautiful creature out of the sky. They call this a sport, but it’s a kind of uneven contest – a human being with a sophisticated modern weapon that can fire projectiles hundreds of metres into the air against…  a bird. The only evenness in this contest may be their intellects. 

To make things fairer, we need to equip ducks with small heat-seeking missiles, triggered by the sound of shotgun fire, and programmed to zero in on the occupants of maimai across the land.  With any luck the project will be underway in time for next year’s ‘Bag a Duckshooter Season’.

Meanwhile here’s a foretaste, drawn to my attention by Q.